all her toil

--> You ain't mine Hell you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine I throw you a kiss and Kill you a flirt But you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine You don’t know me all And you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine We can go to bed And we can do it all And you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine You kill my thoughts And you hear it all But you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine You ain't mine Hell you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine I can feed it all I wanna have you all And you ain't mine And am I glad you ain't mine I don’t know you all But you ain't mine Hell you ain't mine

The stillness and calm are stealing desires The soul isn't being stirred by the perfection Give me an unease or two to deal with the bliss Silence this happiness, give me a thought Take away the paradox, give me a richer day If I continue like this, I may forget...

It's an addiction, this little bit of you A few puffs and a word or two and I'm free Only to hear this emptiness in no time This isn't the way it should be That's what you told me, unsaid, but you did let the feeling stray

No there is no solution None that I know None that they are letting me see Here I lie broken and cluttered With a mist in my eyes They just stare and wonder why I continue to tread alone No one to beg for company They don't understand Maybe they care But it doesn't help Nothing does

I feel like a bit of you When I don't know you Feel like some more When I do

The purpose is to keep distracting yourself! That's what they made me believe That's what I continue to do It's all a bloody lie! Does no one else see it Why am I asking these questions Why weren't these answers in my books. They will never know and may never want to. It's their idea of a joke isn't it Keep making flesh Keep on with agony. Should you be thin or punctual or cancer stricken How does it matter Keep your advice if you don't have answers for me What was your role To find yourself entertainment? I refuse to take responsibility and I am right I've conformed to a few but I can't be burdened by more. I yearn for my small fingers to be led by a warm hand A hand that can lead me to reason. Oh, do come by quickly I am close to giving up.

They smile, they're happy They have and they will They laugh and celebrate They fear no uncertainty They're simple, they're free A why will never be They're blessed. An escape they may never need.

Stop smiling, fool! You've stirred it again I'm pacing the streets I can hear the chatter in my ear A tiny bit of restlessness Where you touched me and left That touch lingers And that smile, oh that smile... Stop smiling! Fool.

Find no one to blame You are the one with a crushed head With a halo of vultures. Your wings have lost their feathers They're all meat and bone Pretty you are no more Inviting may be to a tribe of insects. Crusty scales cover your body Don't touch yourself. Parched tongue and grey eyes Caked with a destitute solitude Dream of that oasis of tears. Bloated belly and shrivelled breast You're the unkind picture of your truth Let those vultures fly you to your heaven Give them a taste of your salt!

I like imperfections too Just the way you do Your fingers searching for that flaw you would love Me giving in to my lesser bits finding joy in what you want don't want to show You letting go

There's nothing I want from you Just a conversation or two I've found that calm again There is no struggle There is no fear A thought is surely spent That leads to a fondness somewhere But if it were all to be taken I'd still be there

I'll spend a few tears on you Wrap a memory or two Your four rooms and you... I'll never be the same again

I've tried to push you away But you find your way in again I have things I expect from you That I don't want you to know What if you give them to me

abandonment and simplicity purity and joy filling and satisfying sure and here joy and fear clear and crazy

There is a side of you I want to see I have my thoughts, you could match them or give me a few of your threads and I'll sew them into my sheets I'll give you a whisper to lead you in and then that faint smile find that flicker and lead you to me I'll wait here and listen to your silence those words that you will not speak I'll wait...you'll wait... I'll open a few of your fingers and step into their creases soak your senses into mine and give myself all that I want to see :)

I let it come in and destroy little by little, piece by piece There may be a way to reality a reality I don't want to see I'm letting it tear away a few thoughts and moments of purity This may not be the sanest but the thrills and joys of the moment are certainly for keeps I'll keep testing them waters until it's too deep and then I'll hope to swim back to safety, to reality but then, that won't be me...

It's blue and green with a spray of grey. It's a beautiful day! There are whispers and chimes hints of a loving times but you are gone far away. I smile for I know your smile when I return The clouds will come and the rains will give us back our day. But now, for right now I wish you were here and we'd do nothing but watch the greens, the blues and the greys.

A want of nothing brought it together. There wasn't a need but it had a thought. Words don't flow for this there sure wasn't a need. Blotted ink and a heavy heart why is there no need.

Luscious and beautiful are possibilities The way that it could be is easy to see It's raw and unreal, yet so precious like it belongs. It's not here and it probably never will be But in an unknown it exists I'll let a few more moments hold on to it. Maybe...

Decided - we shall not live from now on From now on we'll play dead Let the world try and find us We won't even tell ourselves its a game of hide and seek Stop breathing You'll give it away Its easy though it hurts Maybe we'll start enjoying the pain A second will turn into a year in no time Let them pass Then, when we surface - we'll play alive And behave like the world is playing with us We'll do this again and again and again Until....

It's silent, it's complete and it's whole. It's pervading, the insides are shattering You grow accustomed to one and the other one envelopes. Clutter, insanity. Relief isn't got from silence, but relief can't be sought from noise!!

a series of images I see when I close my eyes - writing them down for the first time This one's the protesting dead ones. " It's a high metal gate that is shut. there is a guard on the inside of it and an angry mob on the outside. The mob is made of dead people. they have no eyes and their flesh - white, almost non-existent. They are dressed in white dhotis and banians and have turbans wrapped around their heads. A few of them carry things in their hands, could be sticks. They are screaming, they want to get through to the other side of the gate."

Another one was slain today It was a powerful blow strength that comes out with furious thoughts massacring all in its way there's no mercy, no pity, no empathy nothing matters but that one thought that swings the blow You breathe, it's over and then a realisation that you are lesser human now

unhappiness, misery - they make you think, open you up to reality that you have been skipping and ignoring frequently so. It will make you who you want to be it has made you who you are

Molten, transparent pieces. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Body to body. One lonely, luminous spark Rainbow!

Moans and arcs Passion and joy. Higher, higher.... Cries and screams Tears and hopes. Bound, infinite, existent, forgotten. A stinging across smooth skin. Crimson, surrender.

It's a superiority complex. There were two people on that boat. Just two. Drained from the rain and soaked by the sun, they were forced to travel beyond their will. Wave over wave time flew them by. They forgot who they were, tossed and thrown and pulled back together the next day. many a sunlight and moonlight saw them fade away. Every gush of wind brought them hope, soothing their aches. But it also pushed them farther away from familiarity.

suddenly so suddenly i feel you that gentle hum sings in my ear again a glow fills up the vaccum bring me to you bring me home before i'm awaken before the dream is snatched away

oh that noise that refuses to die down oh that clutter that refuses to clear oh the people

Come hither and look into my eyes Do you see anything... that speck that bothers me, every living minute - refusing to wash out. Come hither and blow a soft breath maybe it will leave Come hither and look into my eyes Do you see anything... - "I see life", you say.

Draining the smoke charring the insides I relish the moments spent with a fool for company! The fingers tremble and dance the amber comes closer and words begin to flow. The knock is silenced Ash flickers beautifully Amber & grey Amber & grey I cradle it like a baby and smother myself.

Soon very soon They will fuse Words & people Imagination & the truth, They will come together And make for a picture A portrait that's grainy But that will still evoke from discerning eyes A truthful nod and a memory.

every summer i watch the roads giving way to the sun this smeltering pot of boiling ink preparing to write a saga of the footprints they bore. A drop of blood, a tear, the sweat of a man in loin, uniting with the soul of the historian to complete the book untold.

lets walk down hand in hand into the setting sun lets walk down hand in hand and forget all that was done lets walk down hand in hand lets make new promises lets walk down hand in hand lets see what trust is lets walk down hand in hand until we grow old lets walk down hand in hand I'll never let go

In the walk of life i carry my dreams with me sometimes heavy on my shoulders Sometimes they carry me making me light and carefree...

I lay naked begging for thorns to be pierced deep within. So the wounds would be hidden. So the blood would seem fresh

Riding on multiple thoughts touching a few million as they pass - bleeding profusely, right in front of my eyes. feeling sorry for the massacre Hating that i started it. But then, give way - while i surge ahead!

Inhuman maybe, in the way I speak But no - wait... Listen to me dream!

Maybe you're right Maybe you're right Maybe they were meant to be Maybe it's ok Maybe we lie on our backs and breathe the dust.

Surely we turn to ashes Surely, we eat our fill Surely, they were here to watch over us Surely, I will survive.